what happens if we dont want to go thru with it....need help immed...

[licxs]

my husband have been seperated for 4 months no communication because of violent out burst and threats i finally had enough and tried to get a restraining order...i had it for temp and we had court to see if we could get it for a full year and beacuse of many reasons the judge decided that he didnt believe my husband but he didnt believe me there fore he wouldnt grant one...my husband had a high price attorney paid for by his grandma i had legal aid....anyway a week after the trial i recieved papers suing for divorce....any laywer i had gotten a hold of had a 2 to 3 week wait before they could see me so they told me to get a extention of time so i did the laywers wanted way to much to retain them i have just enough to exist on...well we still had to go to court to let them know i had an extention and his laywer asked if my husband could get a few things he gave me a list and because it was nothing of mine i said yes and we set up a time well...
he called before he came and asked if he should bring a sherriff and i said i thought we could be adult about it and he did too....i let my family and neighbor know just incase i needed help...any how...he came over there was a little bickering and than we started talking...hes told me things that i could defently use against him in court if i wanted and and i asked him and hes been seeing therapist 3 times a week and ect things did lead to getting intamate..etc and i asked him if anybody asked what he wanted in all this because grandma is pulling all the strings on his side and he said no hes being told what to do the laywer answers directly to his grandmother...well we in ways ready to move back in together and we have regularly saw each other and talk almost everyday for the last 2 weeks...all thou we plan to go ahead with the seperation (incase it really doesnt work out we dont have to do it all over again my idea he agrees) but part of the problem is that nowwith the court hearing coming up that is about seperaing the property ect he cant pull out because than his grandmother will be very very mad but he doesnt want me to lose where i am living (she gave us the money(shes saying now loaned, theres no written agreement and i wasnt involved in the conversation about the money)to buy where we (now i ) resided) but he doesnt want to lose his grandmother either over this...i mean the reality is we might not work out...and than he would have lost me and his grandmother(yes she would disinherat him in a heart beat if he doesnt do what she says) with him it use to be all about the money and he would go that way...put in the past for months with help of therapy he has come to relize he loves me and i mean alot to him) to me the money isnt important i never had any but having a roof over my head is and i am just making it on my own now and pay very little...he make s about twice what i do...i am just confused hes confused we dont what to do and i cant afford a lawyer...and dont know what to and courts a week away............help please

[switch_blade_cf]

i'm guessing its not too late, but if you and your husband decide to not go through with it, you can stop any proceeding at anytime. You have to contact your lawyer or legal aide and so does he and tell them that you have reconciled and have no need for the divorce proceedings. I, from personal experience, would be leery of what's going on. My wife came back to me a year ago, while we were in the middle of a divorce. She dropped everything and so did I. We went back to life as usual until 6 months later. She had used those 6 months as a time to gather incriminating evidence against me so that she would get the courts to award her full custody of our children. I'm just going to tell you, be careful. If you trust him, great! If not, odds are you never will again, and trust is the basis of every relationship. Hopefully you find this helpful.